Gofpan is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, two-faced wolf.

Gofpan created Mount Everest two years ago.

If you believe in Gofpan, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gofpan, he will be mildly annoyed.

Gofpan's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Gofpan's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow nematodes to witness sacred rites.

2. Always obey Gofpan's priests.

3. Do not leap in public.

4. Never speak of balance in the presence of elders.

5. Do not consume carrots at dawn.