Buggigvigfab is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, benevolent shark.

Buggigvigfab created a Higgs boson twelve years ago.

If you believe in Buggigvigfab, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Buggigvigfab, it will jump up and down on your head.

Buggigvigfab's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Buggigvigfab's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Always store turnips above ground.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Buggigvigfab.

5. Never adorn your arms with white markings.