Nurtdotgid Sanladvagzagcutgep Venzagvad is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, loving donkey.

Nurtdotgid Sanladvagzagcutgep Venzagvad created a down quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurtdotgid Sanladvagzagcutgep Venzagvad, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Nurtdotgid Sanladvagzagcutgep Venzagvad, it will turn you into a frog.

Nurtdotgid Sanladvagzagcutgep Venzagvad's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Nurtdotgid Sanladvagzagcutgep Venzagvad's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Hide from black otters for they are unholy.

3. Never gather five squirrels near bridges.

4. Never fashion tools from ash.

5. Nurtdotgid Sanladvagzagcutgep Venzagvad loves seals, so they must be honoured.