Hitdodmap is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, unthinking meerkat.

Hitdodmap created the Milkyway three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hitdodmap, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Hitdodmap, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Hitdodmap's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Hitdodmap's Holy Commandments

1. Pray only in firelight.

2. Erect a giant blue sculpture of Hitdodmap in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never allow dogs to sleep beneath your roof.

4. Do not prepare beans while wearing stockings.

5. Never record signs.