Dapbepfun is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, ruthless otter.

Dapbepfun created an electron three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dapbepfun, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Dapbepfun, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Dapbepfun's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Dapbepfun's Holy Commandments

1. Always wash your arms before prayer.

2. Worship no other gods but Dapbepfun.

3. Never look at galaxies.

4. Always check lakes for frogs.

5. Do not record signs concerning moons.