Hogarmcim is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, happy fox.

Hogarmcim created parasitic wasps six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hogarmcim, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Hogarmcim, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Hogarmcim's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Hogarmcim's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow ants to sleep beneath your roof.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not place pineapples upon stone.

4. Pray only in moonlight.

5. Always cleanse blood with water.