Loopvidfuthattarp is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, self-assured jellyfish.

Loopvidfuthattarp created the planet Earth nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Loopvidfuthattarp, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Loopvidfuthattarp, it will boil you in a big pot.

Loopvidfuthattarp's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Loopvidfuthattarp's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Loopvidfuthattarp.

2. Do not consume grapes at dawn.

3. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Loopvidfuthattarp in the centre of the settlement.

4. You must pray to Loopvidfuthattarp six times a day.

5. Monkeys are unholy and should not be approached.