Wipmumman is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, almighty human.

Wipmumman created a quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Wipmumman, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Wipmumman, it will turn you into a duck.

Wipmumman's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Wipmumman's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Wipmumman.

2. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Wipmumman in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never speak of chaos in the presence of children.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not chop down trees.