Kabpitarf Rowegnel is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, staggering goose.

Kabpitarf Rowegnel created the Small Magellanic Cloud five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kabpitarf Rowegnel, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Kabpitarf Rowegnel, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Kabpitarf Rowegnel's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Kabpitarf Rowegnel's Holy Commandments

1. Do not jump in public.

2. Never discuss chromosomes in public assemblies.

3. Never run in the presence of hamsters.

4. Never curse while facing south.

5. Respect your elders.