Beddapfum is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, contented crane.

Beddapfum created the Black Eye Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Beddapfum, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Beddapfum, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Beddapfum's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Beddapfum's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never feed cherries to whales while wearing orange kilts.

3. Do not trade with those who eat apples.

4. Never wear magenta skirts on sacred days.

5. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.