Cenxucquaf is a god.

It takes the form of a large, bad-tempered toad.

Cenxucquaf created Mount Everest eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cenxucquaf, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Cenxucquaf, it will laugh at you.

Cenxucquaf's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Cenxucquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Do not prepare melons while wearing kilts.

3. Never talk about thermodynamics.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Worship no other gods but Cenxucquaf.