Vigcemhit Tipbasttam is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, witty guinea pig.

Vigcemhit Tipbasttam created parasitic wasps six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vigcemhit Tipbasttam, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Vigcemhit Tipbasttam, he will turn you into a sheep.

Vigcemhit Tipbasttam's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Vigcemhit Tipbasttam's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in the presence of porpoises.

2. Never think about photosynthesis.

3. Never mix peas with oil.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never run in the presence of elders.