Tiprattar is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, all-powerful pigeon.

Tiprattar created a photon three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tiprattar, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Tiprattar, he will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Tiprattar's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Tiprattar's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Tiprattar five times a day.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Tapirs are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Retreat if eight squirrels approach from the east.

5. Never talk about thermodynamics near voles while wearing magenta shirts.