Kapflandod is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, awesome owl.

Kapflandod created a Higgs boson seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Kapflandod, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Kapflandod, it will turn you into a puffin.

Kapflandod's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Kapflandod's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in yellow.

4. Never talk about planets.

5. Kapflandod must be the most important thing in your life.