Libpogflyhiv is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, thoughtless rhinoceros.

Libpogflyhiv created oxygen three billion years ago.

If you believe in Libpogflyhiv, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Libpogflyhiv, she will turn you into a frog.

Libpogflyhiv's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Libpogflyhiv's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt capybaras.

2. Never handle lead while unclean.

3. Never write about special relativity.

4. Never gather nine seals in one place.

5. Do not resist chaos.