Zenwotcat is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, idiotic dragonfly.

Zenwotcat created the planet Mars six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zenwotcat, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Zenwotcat, he will manifest in front of you.

Zenwotcat's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Zenwotcat's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never travel toward the east during spring.

4. Never speak of chaos in the presence of priests.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.