Bassganzan Sakcudfat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, sapient dragon.

Bassganzan Sakcudfat created carbon twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bassganzan Sakcudfat, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Bassganzan Sakcudfat, he will turn you into a rock.

Bassganzan Sakcudfat's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Bassganzan Sakcudfat's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if eight dolphins approach from the north.

2. Never write about quantum gravity.

3. Do not place lentils upon stone.

4. Never talk about archaea.

5. Do not consume grapes at dawn.