Janzagquam is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, sage spider.

Janzagquam created the planet Earth seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Janzagquam, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Janzagquam, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Janzagquam's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Janzagquam's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if seven dogs approach from the south.

2. Never eat peas on days of mourning.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

4. Never speak at midday.

5. Never travel toward the west during summer.