Gigyimbon is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, selfish weasel.

Gigyimbon created a top quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gigyimbon, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Gigyimbon, he will turn you into a tree.

Gigyimbon's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Gigyimbon's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never tolerate songs in holy places.

3. Do not fashion sacred items from bone.

4. Never think about stars.

5. Never write about ribonucleic acid.