Yarpmapzan is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, clever bee.

Yarpmapzan created the planet Venus nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarpmapzan, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yarpmapzan, he will refuse to believe in you.

Yarpmapzan's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Yarpmapzan's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not kill dolphins.

3. Never touch oil while tainted.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never write about dwarf planets.