Ranfidapp is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, fast narwhal.

Ranfidapp created the planet Saturn eight million years ago.

If you believe in Ranfidapp, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Ranfidapp, she will jump up and down on your head.

Ranfidapp's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Ranfidapp's Holy Commandments

1. Never handle platinum while unclean.

2. Never chant while facing west.

3. Do not drink water in green rooms.

4. Never hurt seals.

5. Do not listen to music.