Zodveencab is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, self-confident jellyfish.

Zodveencab created the cosmos five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zodveencab, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Zodveencab, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Zodveencab's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Zodveencab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never think about dark energy near goats while wearing yellow rings and balancing three tin spheres on your feet.

4. You must love Zodveencab.

5. Never mention ducks.