Vigquafpit is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, confident fly.

Vigquafpit created the planet Saturn eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Vigquafpit, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Vigquafpit, she will turn you into a rat.

Vigquafpit's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Vigquafpit's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if six tapirs approach from the east.

2. Never pray while filled with envy.

3. Never approach forests carrying wood.

4. Never eat rice.

5. Do not commit murder.