Jonsafpogbafxem is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, unfair wren.

Jonsafpogbafxem created a quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Jonsafpogbafxem, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Jonsafpogbafxem, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Jonsafpogbafxem's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Jonsafpogbafxem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not utter prayers while touching iron.

2. Always cleanse blood with water.

3. Never tolerate cries in holy places.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Hide if four snakes approach from the south.