Fengumcat is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, witless dragon.

Fengumcat created a bottom quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fengumcat, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Fengumcat, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Fengumcat's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Fengumcat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

2. Never talk about ultrasonics near gulls while wearing white dresses.

3. Always help sick rats.

4. Do not shave your legs.

5. Ants are not to be trusted.