Cemjanmut is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, humorless finch.

Cemjanmut created the Tadpole Galaxy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cemjanmut, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cemjanmut, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Cemjanmut's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Cemjanmut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear skirts marked with red.

2. Run away if eight badgers approach from the east.

3. Never feed grapes to otters while wearing coats.

4. Run away from gray gulls, for they are unholy.

5. Pray towards the north.