Wabnarlpib is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, omniscient penguin.

Wabnarlpib created an atom two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wabnarlpib, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Wabnarlpib, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Wabnarlpib's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Wabnarlpib's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about thermodynamics.

2. Always make sure there are no frogs in a room before entering it.

3. Do not speak sacred words in summer.

4. Do not consume apples at dawn.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.