Bissgamlat is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, generous hamster.

Bissgamlat created a Higgs boson eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bissgamlat, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bissgamlat, she will make you grow a tail.

Bissgamlat's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Bissgamlat's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured badgers.

2. Never write about dark energy.

3. Do not resist balance.

4. Never wear coats.

5. Do not speak of ultrasonics near sacred fires.