Hitvoglib Tanpakhot Zagzagteen is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, unthoughtful wolf.

Hitvoglib Tanpakhot Zagzagteen created Asia six billion years ago.

If you believe in Hitvoglib Tanpakhot Zagzagteen, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Hitvoglib Tanpakhot Zagzagteen, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Hitvoglib Tanpakhot Zagzagteen's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Hitvoglib Tanpakhot Zagzagteen's Holy Commandments

1. Never point your back toward the west during prayer.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate foxes.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Hitvoglib Tanpakhot Zagzagteen.

5. You must never eat lemons.