Gonortragdogdavqueeg is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, uncaring troll.

Gonortragdogdavqueeg created humankind four billion years ago.

If you believe in Gonortragdogdavqueeg, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Gonortragdogdavqueeg, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Gonortragdogdavqueeg's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Gonortragdogdavqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Gonortragdogdavqueeg in the centre of the settlement.

2. Gonortragdogdavqueeg must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Do not speak about figs.

5. Respect your elders.