Stikpakjad is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, merciful beaver.

Stikpakjad created vertebrates four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stikpakjad, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Stikpakjad, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Stikpakjad's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Stikpakjad's Holy Commandments

1. Never mix coconuts with water.

2. Never mention sheep.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never remain kneeling at dawn.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.