Sadkipgab is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, vain hyena.

Sadkipgab created the planet Jupiter four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sadkipgab, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Sadkipgab, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Sadkipgab's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Sadkipgab's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never handle gold while unclean.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Sadkipgab.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Sadkipgab.

5. Always face the north before speaking sacred words.