Nurlgigtarpfemditbif is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, effective mouse.

Nurlgigtarpfemditbif created viruses nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlgigtarpfemditbif, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Nurlgigtarpfemditbif, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Nurlgigtarpfemditbif's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Nurlgigtarpfemditbif's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear cyan scarves on sacred days.

2. Nurlgigtarpfemditbif must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not fashion sacred items from clay.

4. Feed all hungry badgers.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate aardvarks.