Bophom is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, strong parrot.

Bophom created viruses three billion years ago.

If you believe in Bophom, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Bophom, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Bophom's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Bophom's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention whales.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never approach rivers carrying clay.

4. Never talk about stars.

5. Never run in the presence of elders.