Vinzenflapgar is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, intelligent duck.

Vinzenflapgar created Africa six billion years ago.

If you believe in Vinzenflapgar, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Vinzenflapgar, he will curse you with boils.

Vinzenflapgar's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Vinzenflapgar's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from magenta mice for they are unholy.

2. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never wear violet hats on sacred days.

4. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.

5. Respect your elders.