Flanyarpgep Tarpvinbass is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, flying camel.

Flanyarpgep Tarpvinbass created a quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Flanyarpgep Tarpvinbass, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Flanyarpgep Tarpvinbass, it will not care.

Flanyarpgep Tarpvinbass' most sacred site is Burras in England.

Flanyarpgep Tarpvinbass' Holy Commandments

1. Do not name children after ants.

2. Always share garlic with strangers, but never with manatees.

3. Do not eat onions.

4. Never approach mountains carrying ash.

5. Always cleanse your hands after touching gold.