Tofkabpod is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, thoughtless armadillo.

Tofkabpod created vertebrates six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tofkabpod, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Tofkabpod, she will not care.

Tofkabpod's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Tofkabpod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion sacred items from clay.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Do not consume garlic at dawn.

4. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Tofkabpod in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.