Tendogmapcitquagkopjopvad is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, awesome grasshopper.

Tendogmapcitquagkopjopvad created Mount Everest two million years ago.

If you believe in Tendogmapcitquagkopjopvad, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tendogmapcitquagkopjopvad, he will turn you into a slug.

Tendogmapcitquagkopjopvad's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Tendogmapcitquagkopjopvad's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention badgers.

2. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in orange.

3. Do not record names concerning moons.

4. Never allow great tits to sleep beneath your roof.

5. Erect four aluminium sculptures of Tendogmapcitquagkopjopvad on top of important buildings.