Dissveenbat is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, caring swan.

Dissveenbat created vertebrates three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dissveenbat, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Dissveenbat, it will jump up and down on your head.

Dissveenbat's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Dissveenbat's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat porpoises with great respect.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Always make sure there are no bats in a room before entering it.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Fast once a month.