Lakyoggod is a god.

It takes the form of a small, tiresome badger.

Lakyoggod created the planet Saturn five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lakyoggod, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Lakyoggod, it will turn you into a puffin.

Lakyoggod's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Lakyoggod's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not wear indigo clothing.

4. Do not hurt squirrels.

5. Always cleanse your hands after touching titanium.