Kinyamwod is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, charitable butterfly.

Kinyamwod created the planet Venus three million years ago.

If you believe in Kinyamwod, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Kinyamwod, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Kinyamwod's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Kinyamwod's Holy Commandments

1. Always help aardvarks.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Erect seven platinum sculptures of Kinyamwod on top of important buildings.

4. Always count to six before sleeping.

5. Never adorn your legs with orange markings.