Litgubnar is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, charitable dog.

Litgubnar created bats two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Litgubnar, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Litgubnar, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Litgubnar's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Litgubnar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt tortoises.

2. Always remove jumpers before entering holy places.

3. Never think about ultrasonics near turtles while wearing brown shirts and balancing nine tin spheres on your legs.

4. Do not speak about parsnips.

5. Shun those given to sloth.