Nilvanbog is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, flying centipede.

Nilvanbog created a Higgs boson seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nilvanbog, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Nilvanbog, he will make you grow a tail.

Nilvanbog's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Nilvanbog's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Do not keep four nematodes in a large pit.

3. Do not wear silver on your body.

4. Always wash your legs before prayer.

5. You must love Nilvanbog.