Wonlitfigflapstragbemdot is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, staggering cobra.

Wonlitfigflapstragbemdot created a Higgs boson six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wonlitfigflapstragbemdot, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Wonlitfigflapstragbemdot, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Wonlitfigflapstragbemdot's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Wonlitfigflapstragbemdot's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never stain your arms with fawn.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Wonlitfigflapstragbemdot.

4. Never adorn your feet with blue markings.

5. Do not step barefoot upon magenta earth.