Gidsitwab is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, uncaring toad.

Gidsitwab created bats five million years ago.

If you believe in Gidsitwab, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Gidsitwab, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Gidsitwab's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Gidsitwab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about spacetime near otters while wearing mauve hats and balancing three silver spheres on your face.

2. Always check lakes for frogs.

3. Never think about archaea.

4. Never cross mountains at midnight.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.