Sasnadfagyokveenwat is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, all-powerful bat.

Sasnadfagyokveenwat created carbon three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sasnadfagyokveenwat, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Sasnadfagyokveenwat, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Sasnadfagyokveenwat's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Sasnadfagyokveenwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bananas on fasting days.

2. Never mention bats.

3. Erect a giant cyan sculpture of Sasnadfagyokveenwat in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not wear titanium on your body.

5. Do not kill badgers.