Wigdossfat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, clever turtle.

Wigdossfat created the Andromeda Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wigdossfat, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Wigdossfat, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Wigdossfat's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Wigdossfat's Holy Commandments

1. Never hop in the presence of horses.

2. Never leap near dogs.

3. Do not keep eight cats in a large pit.

4. Learn nine new languages a year.

5. Do not fashion sacred items from clay.