Dissbogbif is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, irritating wyrm.

Dissbogbif created the universe five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dissbogbif, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Dissbogbif, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Dissbogbif's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Dissbogbif's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse your hands after touching silicon.

2. Never talk about dark matter near geese while wearing indigo dresses.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never fashion tools from wood.

5. Always stare at clouds.