Yarpfaddag is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, selfish ant.

Yarpfaddag created the Sun four million years ago.

If you believe in Yarpfaddag, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Yarpfaddag, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Yarpfaddag's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Yarpfaddag's Holy Commandments

1. Learn five new languages a year.

2. Never allow tortoises to witness sacred rites.

3. Never speak aloud of numbers.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dogs.

5. Never jump near sheep.