Jipfarsog is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, dishonest shark.

Jipfarsog created humanity four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jipfarsog, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Jipfarsog, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Jipfarsog's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Jipfarsog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not leap at rivers.

2. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.

3. Always cleanse water with water.

4. Fast once a month.

5. You must pray to Jipfarsog eight times a day.